“To Auria, Happy Birthday. I heard you are very beautiful and special. I love you already! Alberto”

Ahhh yes…

(Just did some serious long division to figure out what year that was …and it was 1986…23 years ogo…ouch!)

It was the best present a thirteen year old hair obsessed girl could ask for…an autograph from the man that brought us this amazing hair product, theme song and commercial…I remember running around the house singing…“oooooooh, Alberto Moussse” for like a year…driving my family nuts…what fun! And his accent was truely the best! I don’t have any idea how my cousin got a hold of this autograph for me at the time…but I am sure it has something to do with living in L.A. and being a strong follower all boy hair bands like Motley Crue and Ratt…let the mystery remain I say!

I was very beautiful and special indeed…!!

Caution: Pure Genius

Digging around in my old treasure box while visiting home in April I discovered a scrapbook I put together when I was thirteen. The handmade book was a project for my eighth grade English class and included all the work I did that year. Inside I found a picture of myself standing on a stage in a blond wig, red lipstick, and an old 1950’s dress of my mother’s. I was Doris Day in every sense of the word. At least I thought I was. That week we had to choose our favourite character from history and write a report on him or her and then come to school dressed as that person. Marilyn Monroe was instantly taken by my friend Michelle who was obsessed with her…or obsessed with boys who were obsessed with her or something like that. Damn. I had a blond wig at home and some fifties clothes…who else was I going to be?!

Anyway.

The old scrap book also included a few creative writing projects and a report I made on “Fashion throughout Time”.

And then there was the poem.

The poem that upon reading it some 23 years later confirmed that I am…indeed…a genius. Yes, you heard me, a genius.

Do you have any idea how amazing it is to look into an old box of your old junk after twenty some years and find out that you are genius?!

I can’t tell you how stunned I was at the poem’s brilliance…and how relevant it was to my entire life. I think I sat there on my bedroom floor and read it fifteen times. Amazed. My god I’m a genius.

My husband called from Italy shortly after. I stopped his news, his updates…”Wait, wait, wait…listen to this…your wife is a genius…”

I started to read him the poem over the phone…it went something like this…

Afoot and light-hearted I take to the open road,
Healthy, free, the world before me,
The long brown path before me leading wherever I choose.

Wait just a minute here…I pause…”Afoot?”…I’m thinking to myself. Where did I learn the word “afoot” and how did I learn it and then unlearn it…as I’m a little uncertain of its meaning 23 years later even if it does make sense somehow. Oh ya, I’m a genius, that’s how, I remind myself and continue…

Henceforth I ask not good-fortune, I myself am good-fortune,
Henceforth I whimper no more, postpone no more, need nothing,
Done with indoor complaints, libraries, querulous criticisms,
Strong and content I travel the open road.

I love that last line. I tell my husband I love that last line. I also love Henceforth I ask not good-fortune…

Ok. Hence -what?! This is getting a little weird. Why would any respectable Motley Crue- Rat –Poison loving thirteen year old girl start throwing around words in her poems like henceforth and what’s that other one? Afoot?

My husband was impressed but I had my doubts. I Googled my poems title, The open road.

There were over six million entries.

I was not a genius.

I stare at the screen. Computer says back to me “not a genius” six million times.

After reading the entire version of the poem by Walt Whitman I decided my two verse version was better.  He had like 30 verses. I think he got carried away.

Geniuses do that.

Is it just me or do these two look like graduates of Hogwart’s School of Witchcraft and Wizardry? I never read the books, nor do I give one hair about Harry Potter but there is just something about these two that screams “burgeoning wizards”…maybe it his great big toothy grin that makes me think he’s got  a new magic broom stick and as itching to try it out after this picture was taken…and that crouching-slouching fur covered vixen next to him? She’s a little peeved to have had to change back into human form for the shot…you can just tell…she was really enjoying her morning lounging around the fireplace as a cat…

I’ve had that black and white photo for a while…I can’t remember where I found it but I am sure it was in Washington State. I wanted to share it because it always makes me happy to look at those two and wonder who they were and what they did…magic or no magic, I am sure they were pretty cool.

Photo, bits and bobs all resting on one of my favorite books…they really should reprint this one…

Just writing the word gh*** gives me the creeps, so I won’t. For me it is like staring at dark murky water and thinking of the word Titanic…there are just some things I can’t do without getting bad chills and wanting to go whahahaha. So I guess last night for me the choice was simple: Earthquake. My husband Simone and I were watching Harry Potter and the “Something Something”…(it was in Italian and has a weird word in the title anyway). Midway through the bed starts to shake, or I should say sway back and forth kind of gently and silently. I think, “earthquake”, for about 5 seconds until I actually say it out loud five seconds later and jump out of bed with Simone. The shaking stops and there is no sign of anything, no swaying hanging lamp, nothing. After checking out the window to see if there are people on the street and checking the news on line we decide to risk it and go back to finish the film.

All I can think of all night is gh***,gh***,gh***! I try to sleep for about two hours with one eye open. I start to put mysterious signs from the day together and already planning to look for a new apartment at day break. Above all, I am convinced that this supernatural force has been awoken by me taking out my old photo collection and leaving them out in my studio. I expect to find them in the morning rearranged and spelling the word “Murder” across my desk…

I have never been so pleased to see an earthquake had occurred in our region. I am truly a sick woman! After all Italy has been through with earthquakes this year, and I would still prefer one to a ghost…go figure…

But since we are on the subject of Gh****, there is one that I will miss…

Ghost